How To Change Your Negative Thoughts

Distorted thinking styles are not only common, they’re also human. Dr. Araron Beck’s theory of cognitive therapy first recorded these and Dr. David D. Burns refined them further. 

Distorted Thinking Styles

  • All or nothing – everything is black or white. Right or wrong. Perfect or a failure.
  • Mental Filtering – looking at the world through pessimistic frame, filtering out all the positive aspects of a situation.
  • Over-generalisation forming a general conclusion based on one piece of information: “You’re always wrong.” One negative event is part of an endless pattern.
  • Being right – feeling we must always prove that what we think, do or say is right.
  • Blaming – holding other people responsible for the pain or unhappiness you are feeling.
  • Disqualifying the positive – unable or unwilling to accept a compliment.
  • Jumping to conclusions – drawing negative conclusions without checking to see if they have any foundation.
  • Magnification or minimization – catastrophizing the unpleasant problems or mistakes and minimising anything that might make you feel good.
  • “Shoulds” and “musts” believing they are backed up by some universal law.
  • Martyr syndrome – all your “giving” and self-sacrifice should pay off and you become bitter when it doesn’t.
  • Emotional reasoning – making our feelings become who we are. “I feel inferior so therefore I must be.”
  • Personalization – blaming yourself for something that was largely out of your control.

Thought Stopping

If we can replace these irrational thoughts that occur repetitively and endlessly, we can then look more realistically at our lives. Cognitive restructuring techniques may sound overly complicated but they are really quite simple. First, we must catch ourselves when thinking negative thoughts.

  • Find a rubber band to fit on your wrist that is loose enough to be comfortable.
  • Each time you catch yourself in a negative thought (around what is about to happen, what is happening or what has happened) flick the band on your wrist, as a reminder.
  • Create a picture in your mind of a STOP SIGN in front of you, which will help you stop unwanted thoughts. It will take practice, but with time your brain will do this on its own.
  • Make yourself aware that you are having unwanted thoughts by saying to yourself, “I’m having the thought that…”. This reminds you that these are only thoughts, not something that will happen.

Would you like to get unstuck and overcome obstacles that are holding you back? Book a session with me here

How To Reconnect With Nature & Yourself

“Look deep into nature, and then you will understand everything better” – Albert Einstein 

The gifts of nature are abundant, offering us freedom and connection to boost our mental health and physical wellbeing. In fact, time spent in nature expands the mind and sharpens thinking.

One of the lessons we can learn from nature is that there is no such thing as perfection, so why do we command perfection from ourselves? No tree or flower is perfect but we accept them as they are. Basking in the beauty of nature, allows us to take the pressure off ourselves and maintain our present moment awareness.

Getting away from high-rise buildings, technology and noise pollution on a regular basis makes you happier, calmer and more grounded. It also has a significant impact on reducing stress and anxiety, while increasing creativity. When we get out in nature, we find a natural rhythm with our surroundings as time slows down. Next time you’re out in nature, allow yourself to be guided by the sun rising and setting. 

How To Reconnect With Nature & Yourself

  • Buy a plant for your desk
  • Watch a sunrise or sunset
  • Plant your own garden or a community garden
  • Have a picnic in the park
  • Go for a hike and listen to the sounds of nature
  • Take vacations in nature 
  • Do yoga on the beach
  • Look up at the stars 
  • Meditate by the ocean
  • Relax on a park bench with an inspiring book
  • Take a mindful walk in the park and notice the vibrancy of colors and textures
  • Hug a tree
  • Bird watch
  • Walk barefoot on the grass 

Nature is free and gives us the space to let go of our ruminating thoughts and reconnect with ourselves.

Do you need help reducing stress? Click here to book a session with me.

 

 

 

10 Tips To Practice Mindfulness and Sharpen Awareness

Mindfulness is a form of meditation that you can practice any time and anywhere. From mindful eating to mindful walking and mindful living – it’s about being in the present moment and bringing awareness to what you’re directly experiencing through your breath and the five senses (sight, sound, touch, taste and smell). 

The opposite of mindfulness is being on autopilot, which has you disconnected from your body and constantly striving to get things done. It can also also leave you stuck in old mindsets. Being present helps you appreciate the richness of life.

10 Tips To Practice Mindfulness and Sharpen Awareness

  • Drinking a cup of tea
  • Patting a beloved pet
  • Arranging a bouquet of flowers
  • Practicing yoga
  • Listening to guided meditations
  • Taking a mindful walk in nature
  • Watching the waves in the ocean
  • Mindful breathing
  • Mindfulness body scan meditation
  • Mindful listening

While it’s completely normal to get off focus, you can bring yourself back to the present moment at any time through the five senses. 

Would you like to have more confidence and balance in your life? Book a session with me here

The Healing Benefits of Hawaii

The Hawaiian Islands have long been a favorite amongst travelers, and especially those who come to Hawaii for a wellness vacation

For Hawaiians, a healthy and balanced life starts with the Aloha Spirit. Aloha means hello and goodbye to love, caring, sharing and goodwill to others. In a nutshell (or should I say, coconut shell), aloha means a way of life.

To maintain optimal health, Hawaiians practise constant cleansing of the mind, body and spirit. Healing is believed to occur in many different ways. 

Hawaiian Practice of Forgiveness 

Ho’oponopono is an ancient Hawaiian practice of forgiveness. Ho‘oponopono comes from ho‘o (“to make”) and pono (“right”). The repetition of the word pono means “doubly right” or being right with both self and others. Ho‘oponopono is a process by which we can forgive others to whom we are connected.

Hawaiian Massages

  • Kahuna: An ancient Hawaiian massage passed down by the Hawaiian Kahuna tribe that originated in the South Pacific. It is also known as Hawaiian Temple Style and Lomi Lomi massage. In the Hawaiian language, Lomi Lomi means to press or knead. Lomi Lomi incorporates long, flowing strokes using the forearms, elbows, wrists and hands in a continuous, fluid, rhythmic motion that can energize and ground you at the same time. It’s a relaxing massage that nourishes multiple parts of the body at the same time as well as healing the body mind and spirit.
  • Lomi Mohala: This massage will open your heart, mind, body and soul during an exclusive herbal oil blend that melts away tension. It’s an ancient technique, which utilizes rhythmic forearm strokes, allowing you to experience the expansive feeling of mohala (opening).
  • Lomi Pohaku: Heated stones are incorporated into the traditional Hawaiian lomi lomi modality to penetrate and soothe tightened muscles for an even deeper relaxation of the entire body.
  • Lomi Aumoa: The ultimate relaxation with a four-handed lomi lomi massage. Two therapists synchronize their movements in this indulgent treatment, producing double the benefits. You will emerge nourished, protected and completely relaxed.

Planning a wellness vacation to Hawaii?  Book a session with me here

 

 

 

 

Disconnect To Reconnect In The Real World

Ahhh MySpace. That was my very first introduction to social media back in 2005. I soon followed with a Facebook account, then Twitter and eventually Instagram. But several years later, I deleted them all except for Facebook, which I rarely use now. As a Generation X girl, I began to reflect on life before the Internet and how I used to spend my time. I wanted to make better use of my time by choosing to disconnect to reconnect in the real world. 

Of course, having an online business means being online, but I didn’t need to extend it to social media distractions. By limiting my use of technology I created a win-win situation. I unsubscribed from newsletters, turned off notifications on my phone, signed out of Facebook and shut down my computer to reduce screen time. 

Researchers have found that too much screen time can have a negative affect on your health and wellbeing. We put our brains through an exhausting physical workout, day in day out. The constant stimulation from our phones and computers never gives our minds a chance to truly rest. Next time your in a public place, take a look around you and you’ll find that at least one or more people engrossed in their phone.

Health Risks of Too Much Screen Time

  • Headaches
  • Chronic neck and back pain
  • Insomnia
  • Impaired cognitive function
  • Weight gain
  • Anxiety
  • Reduced attention span
  • Irritated eyes
  • Social isolation and loneliness

Going on a digital detox can have tremendous benefits on the body and mind.

Benefits of a Digital Detox

  • Gets your creative juices flowing
  • Mindfulness
  • Calmer
  • Healthier relationships
  • Face-to-face connections
  • Better sleep
  • More productive
  • Improves physical health
  • Increased happiness

There’s no denying that technology is incredible but being able to unplug and have some time away from the screen will leave you feeling refreshed and energized and more in touch with the world around you.

Do you need to go on a digital detox and find more balance and freedom in your life? Book a session with me here

How Mindful Eating Could Help You Lose Weight

Being aware of why we are eating is essential to changing the behavior. Mindful eating involves paying full attention to the experience of eating and drinking. It has been shown that by practising mindful eating, people may be able to control their emotional eating and overeating habits, enjoy their food and feel more aware of the body’s physical hunger and satiety signals.

Mindful Eating Techniques 

  • Eat small or moderate amounts of food every 2-3 hours
  • Pause before eating and ask questions e.g. Am I hungry? Am I thirsty? How do I feel? Why am I eating? Ask what type of food/drink do I want? Will it satisfy the hunger?
  • Sit down to eat at a table with food served on the plate
  • Sit in a quiet environment with no distractions
  • Eat slowly and pay attention to the food using all the senses
  • Put utensils or food down between mouthfuls
  • Wait 10-20 minutes after a meal before eating more food if you’re still hungry
  • Feel grateful for your food

Looking to add whole food plant-based foods to your diet? Book a session with me here

10 Self-Care Tips For Women To Boost Oxytocin

“Slow down, this ain’t the Mainland”, is a catchy phrase here in Hawaii, referring to the speed limit and slower pace of life in Hawaii. But slowing down is also a healthy approach to self-care.

Sometimes a busy schedule just gets in the way of taking care of yourself, but letting that happen can actually make things worse. Neglecting self-care can actually have a negative affect on your wellbeing by keeping you stuck in unhappy and unhealthy behaviors.

Taking time each day to nurture ourselves is an act of self-love, which also boosts oxytocin aka the “love hormone”. Look for activities that promote inner peace and calm, that allow you to unwind from stress and get in touch with your needs. Be creative with your self-care and don’t forget to have fun along the way!

10 Self-Care Tips For Women To Boost Oxytocin

  • Meditate
  • Eat a whole-food plant based meal
  • Go for a walk in nature
  • Read an inspiring book
  • Take a relaxing aromatherapy bath
  • Be mindful with a cup of tea
  • See a movie
  • Get a massage
  • Tap into creativity with a mindful coloring book
  • Light some candles and listen to music

Do something to nurture yourself every day. You matter.

Do you want to be the best version of yourself? Click here to book a wellness coaching session with me.